Friday, June 07, 2013

The MMPI Never Lies

Early in our relationship my husband had occasion to ask me to take the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory (MMPI). He was still in graduate school and taking his assessment course. He needed a practice subject and I said, sure, why not.  Since my undergraduate degree is in Psychology, I knew the scale but had never taken the test.  Let me explain:  The MMPI identifies personality structure. Basically you answer a bunch of questions about your interests and feelings and then get scores on various personality traits. The test has been used by the Department of Defense and the CIA to screen applicants.  One of the many personality traits it identifies is femininity.

In reviewing my results my husband said that I got abnormally high scores on the femininity scale. He kept looking at me askance so I asked him who else would get scores like that and he said, "Well sometimes drag queens score that high."  That will make you take a beat.  So now thirty years later I guess I'm still pretty high on the femininity scale. I say this because of my latest obsession:  hostess aprons.  I saw a pattern for one online and ordered it. Then during a particularly stressful period this past winter I shut myself up in my sewing room and made not one, but two. Then I sent email of one of them  on Zelda the dress form to my friends.  Now every time I am in Williams Sonoma or Sur La Table or any little boutique I am drawn to the aprons.  Apparently I have my finger on the pulse of the female consumer market because there is a whole cottage industry growing up around hostess aprons right now.  There are blogs about them. I'm not making this up. 

So, here is Zelda in my first apron:


It's a sickness I know.  Now I am planning to make a really fancy one like they used to wear in the fifties.  And I almost bought one in Sur La Table last week. I did buy a washed linen chef's apron at William Sonoma because it was on sale and it was so pretty and I don't have a washed linen apron.  I can imagine the 12 step meeting for this:

Hello, my name is Jackie and I am addicted to household linens. Last week I bought six sets of lace doilies and counted them as staples.


Actually I wouldn't be caught dead buying lace doilies. They are way too fussy. I prefer to spend my money on ethnic print place mats.

It's hopeless, I know, but look it's so pretty...


7 comments:

Joy said...

An "abnormally high score on femininity," he said? Interesting. A female drag queen. This is so funny. I can't wait to see Zelda in the fancy one. Glad to see you posting again!

Jackie said...

Yes, and he delivered the line with typical Ed-like deadpan. The drag queen comment was the kicker, though. I am trying to get just the right combination of fabrics for the fancy one. These things cannot be rushed.

Miss Ginger Grant said...

Now I want to take this test and see if I can beat your score!!! And once I finish the harem pants I am making for my cousin, I may have to bang out a couple of hostess aprons, just to make sure my skills are current! Loved your post... I followed the link from Joy's blog!

Jackie said...

Oh Miss Ginger let's not be competitive, there is room for everyone in hyper-femininity land. If you want to get a really good hostess apron pattern, try Decades of Style. That's where I got the one on Zelda. They also have a 1942 house dress that is my next project. I love the picture on the pattern package. I mean the woman is wearing a princess seamed dress, high heels and holding a broom. It's classic!

Joy said...

Jackie, there's no contest with Miss Ginger. Remember that closet I told you to look at on her blog that we went into envy overload about? And the freezer and pantry? Yes. Check out her blog, and she is an actual drag queen and organizational diva!!

Love your exchanges with each other!

Jackie said...

Yes, Joy, I know Miss Ginger is my superior in every way. This is why I asked her not to be competitive. I knew I would lose! Miss Ginger, I showed my husband a picture of your closet and told him that it was my dream to have one just like it. The dear man did his best. While I was away in Ghana he ripped out my closet and built a new inside but, alas, it does not compare. So now as we contemplate downsizing we are looking for a house that is smaller but has one bedroom that can become my closet. The look on realtors' faces when I explain this is priceless.

Joy said...

Miss Ginger is everyone's superior in all things domestic. You're amazing yourself, Jackie.